FREAK(S) OF THE WEEK: Joe “You Lie” Wilson, Carrie “Opposite Marriage” Prejean, and Jack “Hypocrite” Layton

After a week off to attend the annual convention of the National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association convention in

Montreal, the FredBlog is back with a bag full o’ freaks. So let’s get the party started as the FredBlog shines its freaklight on this week’s Freaks of the Week:

1. Congressman Joe Wilson of South Carolina

Joe Wilson was freaky enough for shouting out “You lie” during President Barack Obama’s address to Congress. But piling freakiness upon freakiness is this past week’s revelation that Wilson, um, LIED!

If you recall, Wilson raised the roof during Obama’s healthcare address over the issue of illegal immigration. And what makes him such as expert on the issue? Here’s how he explained it during a press conference: “I’m for immigration, legal immigration. I’m an immigration attorney.”

However, as revealed by the website TPMmuckraker, he is nothing of the sort. In fact, he is a real estate lawyer. It even says so on his own website.

TPMmuckraker interviewed a number of South Carolina attorneys as well the American Immigration Lawyers Association. No one knows Wilson as anything but a real estate attorney.

So please join the FredBlog in shouting out to Mr. Wilson, “You lie!”

2. Former Miss California USA Carrie Prejean

Carrie Prejean is full of catchphrases. First, she made headlines by giving props to “opposite marriage.” Now, it’s all about, “God chose me.”

You see, this past week Prejean spoke at the right-wing Family Research Council’s so-called Values Voter Summit in Washington, D.C. (Sarah Palin wasn’t available, so they went with someone who I’m guessing can’t even find Russia on a map!)

In her speech to the Value (if hate is a value) Voters, Prejean discussed her pageant moment when celebrity judge Perez Hilton asked her about same-sex marriage. She told the crowd, “As I saw my goals and aspirations flash by me, I knew God had a plan for me. … He chose me for that moment.”

Yes, Ms. Prejean, of all the people in the world, God chose a dumbass beauty queen. Donald Trump may have chosen you, but God certainly did not.

3. Jack Layton, leader of the New Democratic Party of Canada

Jack Layton, leader of Canada’s far-left party, has made a career of bashing the center-left Liberal Party over the head for not voting down the ruling Conservative Party and its Bush-alike leader, Prime Minister Stephen Harper.

In fact, in the last election campaign, Layton puffed himself up as the only true opposition leader. And Layton’s disdain for Harper goes so deep that he didn’t even bother reading the last Conservative budget before deciding his party would vote against it.

But finally, the Liberals have had enough. Liberal leader Michael Ignatieff announced this past week that his party would indeed vote to bring down the Conservatives, forcing a federal election.

Oh, but wait, the polls don’t look good for Layton and the New Democrats. So instead of siding with the Liberals, something he has been waiting for, Layton engineered a reason to prop up the Conservatives. Worse yet, Layton says he will continue to support the Conservatives on a number of upcoming confidence motions.

So on a dime, Layton has switched from damning the Liberals for propping up the Conservatives to doing it himself. Hypocrisy doesn’t begin to describe Layton’s freakiness.

FREAK OF THE WEEK: Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin

This week, the FredBlog shines its freaklight on Sarah Palin, who earns the distinction of becoming the first person ever to be named Freak of the Week twice! Are congratulations in order? You betcha!

Making Palin’s achievement even more impressive is just how much freakiness she was up against.

There was Canadian Transport Minister John Baird, who was forced to apologize after telling the city of Toronto to “f--k off.”

There was Canadian Natural Resources Minister Lisa Raitt, who was forced to apologize after saying that people potentially dying of cancer is a “sexy” political issue.

And there was now-former Miss California USA, who was unapologetically told, “You’re fired,” by beauty pageant owner Donald Trump.

But the freakiest of them all was Palin, who refused to apologize for calling David Letterman a pedophile, even after the “Late Night” host apologized for a joke that he really didn’t have to apologize for.

It all started with Letterman telling a joke. (Really? Letterman tells jokes? News to Palin!)

In talking about the Palin family’s recent trip to New York, Letterman said there was “an awkward moment … during the seventh inning when her daughter was knocked up by [New York Yankees third basemen] Alex Rodriguez.”

Anyone who has been paying attention to the Palin Family farce would know that the joke was referencing daughter Bristol. It was Bristol Palin, after all, who was famously “knocked up” by her high-school hockey-playing now-ex-boyfriend Levi Johnston.

This became a legitimate story since now-18-year-old Bristol Palin seemed to be living the kind of life her mother campaigns so strongly against. It pointed to the hypocrisy of preaching abstinence-only to teens while your own teen daughter isn’t listening.

But post-joke, Sarah has been trying to argue that since it was not Bristol who attended the Yankee game with her, but her 14-year-old daughter Willow, Letterman was saying that it was Willow who got “knocked up” during the game. Therefore, Sarah Palin says, Letterman was promoting statutory rape.

What!?!?!? She can’t be serious. But oh yes, she is!

On its face, this criticism is ridiculous. Who even knew that Willow was at the game? The joke was obviously, without a doubt, about Bristol. So on that front, case closed.

But Sarah was also trying to make the case that all of her daughters should be off limits when it comes to this kind of ridicule. After all, she and her supporters said, no one would make fun of Obama daughters Sasha and Malia.

Again, is she serious?!?! Bristol Palin is not only 18, and thus an adult, but she has put herself in the public spotlight. She chose to do a round of media interviews once she was hired by the Candie’s Foundation to be a spokesperson for teen abstinence (a joke in and of itself).

So to spell this out – Bristol Palin is not a minor AND she is a public figure. Therefore, it is fair that she be a target by the likes of Letterman. Again, case closed.

Despite there being no need for Letterman to apologize, he did anyway. He even invited the Palins on his show. That should have been the end of it, right?

Oh no, not when it comes to the Palins.

Sarah not only refused to appear on Letterman’s show, but added on her Facebook page: “It would be wise to keep Willow away from David Letterman.”

You know, because, according to the Palins, Letterman might knock up Willow. Even if the Palins were really offended by Letterman’s initial joke, this insinuation is sick.

And if all that weren’t enough, Sarah ended the week by going on the “Today” show and telling co-host Matt Lauer that what Letterman said not only hurt her and her family but, “I would like to see him apologize to young women across the country” for contributing to a culture “that says it’s OK to talk about statutory rape.”

So when the American people didn’t buy that Letterman was disparaging Willow, she decided to make this about ALL teen girls. Classy move.

And when Lauer asked her about the comment insinuating that Letterman is a pedophile, Sarah said, “Take [the comment] however you want to take it. It was a comment that came from the heart.”

So Sarah, it’s not OK for Letterman to make a joke about your adult public-figure daughter, but it IS OK for YOU to call Letterman a pedophile because it “came from the heart”?

Well, here’s a comment that comes from my heart: You’re a freak!

FREAK OF THE WEEK: Miss California USA Carrie Prejean

This week, the FredBlog shines its freaklight on Carrie Prejean, the Miss USA contestant who blames her beauty-contest loss on her support for “opposite marriage.”

I wish it weren’t so easy to pick on beauty contestants. Then again, they keep saying the darnedest things. Remember Miss Teen South Carolina Caitlin Upton talking about “the Iraq,” maps and “U.S. Americans”? More recently, there was Miss Universe Dayana Mendoza, who couldn’t wait to tell everyone about what a great vacation spot the U.S. military prison at Guantanamo Bay is.

That brings us to Carrie Prejean, first runner up in last weekend’s Miss USA pageant and the latest to put her stiletto-heeled foot in her mouth.

Here’s what Prejean said when celebrity judge Perez Hilton asked her about her views on marriage rights for same-sex couples: “We live in a land where you can choose same-sex marriage or opposite marriage. And you know what, I think in my country, in my family, I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a women. No offense to anybody out there, but that’s how I was raised.”

First of all, what the fudge is “opposite marriage”? Isn’t the opposite of marriage divorce?

Secondly, she has seemingly declared California to be its own country, since that is where she lives that has declared – thanks to Prop 8 – that same-sex couples are not allowed to marry. Maybe she just forgot that four U.S. states continue to allow same-sex couples to legally wed.

As far as “in my family,” I’d hate to see what happens if it turns out she has a gay sibling or cousin.

Oh, and that’s how you were raised? Well, Ms. Prejean, were you also raised to sound as stupid as possible while trying to get by on nothing but your looks?

To make matters worse, Prejean then went on the “Today” show to say that her views are “not about being politically correct. For me, it’s about being biblically correct.”

Well, Ms. Prejean, let’s see you point to the passage in the bible that explicitly states that civil societies should treat gay and lesbian people like second-class citizens. Even better, point to anything at all in the bible that forbids lesbians from getting married.

Oh, and since it’s so important for you to be “biblically correct,” then I’m sure you never wear clothing of mixed fabrics, you approve of slavery, you support the death penalty for adulterers, and you “give to everyone who asks of you.”

And if you do give to all who ask, I politely ask that you stick to pageantry and leave the political punditry to others. That would be a gift worth giving.